What for what, we don’t love them ****

This PSA is not for every one and that’s ok, not too much today is for every one but I’m living in my truth so have at it rabbit.

I, do not love. I do not love, as referenced to the biblical definition of love.

1 Corinthians 13:4-

Love is patient. Yeah, that’s not me or anyone sitting on the 405, 95, 64, 270 or any other interstate/highway in gridlock, deadlock, bumper to bumper traffic and ESPECIALLY when there is not an accident, disabled vehicle or any other mechanical, non-life threatening issue causing said perceived reason for the lack of “love” read patience. Collective sighs, grunts, honking horns and jar-filling expletives can be heard at any given point in time around the globe.

Love is kind. I’ve been told (and I’m told it’s better to be told than to offer ones own opinion) that I am a kind person but that goes out the window when my patience is being tested or running thin. I read an e-quotable one time and it read “Do not say that person gets on your nerves, but think, that person sanctifies me.” In the course of an 8-hour day, how many times are you “sanctified?”

It [love] is not jealous. A little jealousy is a good thing, I mean the healthy jealousy. For example, my friend redid her kitchen, I’m jealous because I’ve been too lazy and lacked the patience to redo my kitchen. That other type of jealousy, well that leads to loss of patience which definitely will result in lost love and if one isn’t careful, in life.

It [love] is not pompous. We all can get a little “high on the horse” but the trick, I believe, is not to stay there. I’ve never been thrown/knocked from a horse and if it’s all the same, I’ll just take that cue from Saul/Paul. Sometimes you have to encourage yourself. Encourage yourself, not make/turn yourself into an ass.

It [love] is not inflated. Again, when we say or do something we, and maybe others, feel is important, we tend to swell up with pride. Pride cometh before the fall so if you let your chest stay puffed up to big for too long, that fall is coming soon and it will be hard because that Pride will get crushed just before the rest of you.

It [love] is not quick-tempered. Call me Virginia Slims because I’ve come a loonnnnggg ways baby. I used to go “zero to a hunnit, real quick – Drake voice”. Now, it’s more zero to 7 and not real quick but you can hear the tires screeching and most definitely see the smoke and smell it burning. I think this is so because we humans tend to take such liberties with our freedom of speech and feel we can talk to others like our mind is bad. This character flaw stays on my vision board. I inherited this lovely trait from my mother. Cyclops got nothing on my mom.

It [love] does not brood over injury. If you’ve ever heard someone say “I get pissed off just thinking about it” then they do not love. Whatever happened, it is still there, just as fresh as the day it happened. Somebody is broody over injury. I find this more so with women than men.

It [love] does not rejoice in wrongdoing but rejoices in truth. Most people I know and probably overall don’t do Pharrell’s Happy Dance when misfortune befalls someone but there are always exceptions. I do not do this because it just seems to invite Karma to show up. This one thing I can do.

It [love] bears all things… Some of us, including me a times, adopt Popeye’s slogan – “I’ve had all I can stand, I can’t stands no more.” We can’t stand to bear hot weather, cold weather, power outages, rising gas prices, poor customer services, low paying jobs, high paying – stressful jobs, etc., but we do, we put it with it every day, we bear it. We love despite all the undigestive waste we have to put up with but rarely are we willing to bear it for personal reasons. #aintnobodygottimeforthat

…believes all things… Um, I’ll believe what you tell me unless you show me different or I just already know. If were strangers, no reason to lie; if we are friends, definitely no reason to lie; if we are family, why would you even want to lie. But remember, I still believe in Santa Claus.

…hopes all things… Yep, I get my Jessie Jackson on every day. Keeping hope alive requires some skill and Johns Hopkins training won’t help you here. To find hope or how to practice hope you have to go to preschool. Hope is born and bred there.

…endures all things… Yeah, again, back to that whole patience and bearing all things. Weeping may endure for a night… for a night, some of us have been enduring for so long, when the morning comes and joy shows up we may not answer the door for fear it’s some solicitor knocking at our door. I want joy to show up at night or at least send hope to keep me company.

Love never fails. This is true but those who profess it give Love a bad name. Often we get this wrong and fail ourselves and others miserably in the process.

So no, I do not love. I have great affection and a strong and genuine like but my level of love is seriously lacking. I’m ok with saying it because knowing and acknowledging is half the battle. I’m working on love but geez louise if people don’t make it sooo difficult to love. I used to concern myself about other peoples thoughts when I wrote things like this but who gives spider’s web. Think what you want, create your own stories about what this is about, I’m just working through life. We all, in my opinion, need to learn better lessons and expressions of love, in the biblical sense. Love, is not the great affection, heart pounding, stomach fluttering brain crashing, spine tingling, toe curling wave of hormones, pheromones, serotonin, and whatever other innate chemical found within us that is activated by a sight, scent, touch or thought. Love is effort and hell, I’m tired but Jesus was tired too, at least I like to believe he was tired, hanging up on that cross. I have no right to complain about anything and I’m not complaining, I’m acknowledging my shortcomings – confessing my sins to another (a whole lot of anothers to be exact) in an effort to self-correct. Love is effort and sometimes we lack the energy to love but we want energetic love. I now understand why some people have dogs; they give great love (effort and energy). I want a dog but the problem is my love isn’t on the same level as their love. They would love me more than I would love them. This seems to be the case for us humans for we love (effort and energy) some more than they love us and some humans just love themselves.

I love myself!! I think.

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