Ishmael. Mr. Tibbs. Sybil.
I think names are fascinating as they can give you insight into a person long before you ever meet them. My name seems to be a source of concern for many, as I am often asked about it, what it stands for and why I don’t use/like my SSN name. I honestly answer and say, I love my name. My name is personal and that means you may not do with it as you please. I’m amazed at the liberties people take when addressing someone. If your name is Elizabeth, how many times have people assumingly referred to you as Liz? Maybe only your friends, family call you Liz and heaven forbid if you correct them, oh, you don’t like to be called Liz. No, I’m actually ok with being called Liz, just not by you. We are not friends. Which leads me to today’s discussion of multiple personalities. That was some segway, right?
The world is a classroom and life is the teacher and for many of us, our course load consists of Acting 101. I take this class every day, matter of fact, I or the me that is required sometimes sub for the regular teacher. My friends and I seriously joke that we are but a signature away from acknowledging whatever un/diagnosed quirk, eccentricity, ism or disorder that has taken residence within our mobile, temporary classroom. I personally have at least 7 people living inside my head, none of whom should ever be licensed to carry a gun. Now before you go get all ADA offended on me let me explain. Those 7 or so people are just different versions of me and they emerge when needed. I am who I need to be, when I need to be them, for whomever needs me to be “them” for however long I need to be. Get it? When you really sit back and think about it, you too have 7 or so people living inside your head. Only you can decide if any should be licensed to carry a gun. Some people have parents, doctors, taxi drivers, bankers, etc. Others may have gardeners, counselors, fighters and rescuers. Regardless who you are, you’re bound to have someone other than the person reading this, reading this. The critic in you may be taking over as you digest every word. There are those of unicorn legend who oddly enough live alone. They are the ones who play the same role with everyone, everyday all day. They usually go by the name Jerk, Ass, or some other undesirable adjective that causes their government name to be replaced permanently.
I’m comfortable in my acting roles. I know my lines and stand ready for my cues. Occasionally I may flub a line or forget my place, but someone playing a judge is always standing by, waiting to correct me, to which the defense lawyer arises to do battle with the prosecutor while the bailiff observes, cautiously. At any give point and time, I’ve been all four within seconds of each other. Creepy when you break it down that way isn’t it. The next time you become engaged in any sort of circumstance/situation, notice how and how many times your personality changes to deal effectively with the circumstance/situation. Calling any customer service number will bring out a few mad hatters, sailors and prize fighters without much provocation.
All this brings me back to my name. I can hear and feel people’s reaction when I correct them for calling me by my government name when that privilege has not been bestowed upon them. Whenever I correct someone regarding my name, I know exactly who they are planning to call and Bitch, being the good southern host that she is, never fails to disappoint. Harmony is learning to get the jump on B, but she is so quick, gotta watch out for her. Tonight I’ve been a writer, a philosopher, a comedian, a smarty pants, a messenger, a customer, a sinner, a provider and a few other roles, headlining and supporting but through it all I have never once lost my sense of self. I know exactly who I am. I AM the I am I need to be when I am needed. As previously stated, I… AM the magnificent.
All my best,
Holly Golightly 🙂